How to show a man that you love him

   Hey girl!, there you are dressed up to the nines, wearing your best dress, hair done, all ready for fun and romance prepared to enjoy the party, and suddenly you see him, just the sort of guy you have always fancied. And he is alone, wow!.

   But what do you do?, walk up to him and tell him you fancy him?, ask him for a dance?, no, he may snub you, offer him a drink?, okay, grab the hostess and insist that she introduces you?, No, even in our liberated days the direct approach can be difficult for a lady. The most self confident modern-minded lass might feel deep down that it is up to the man to make the first move.

   However, psychologists have been working on how to show a man you love him without saying it, they have come to the conclusion that it is possible to give out 'I fancy you' signals without saying it. It is a good pride saver too, if he doesn't respond, there is nothing lost but a little time and there is no risk of out-right rejection, also if you make your moves subtly no one except you and your possible conquest need know.

   So how do you start?. First of all you have to get close enough to send out signals, hoping he will pick up the radar through a room packed with gyrating couples and boozing people, it's quite unrealistic.Get yourself as near as possible, at best you should be able to walk yourself into the group he's conversing with.  If not, go talk to someone near him.

   Your first weapon is called 'Eye talk', it's greatly respected by psychologists and has been used through the ages as a means of communication in romantic matters.

    Firstly, you have to catch his eye. It does not mean you should stare aggressively or grin and wink neurotically until he looks your way, no, a long level but friendly look is best. He will probably respond with an interested look and a grin, smile back now. If he looks away quickly and seems embarrassed, you are either over doing it or he is shy, chances are he look back again later, if the latter is true smile this time.

   If he is not interested, or his feelings are already tied up elsewhere he will probably get out of orbit at this point. In which case it is better to cut your losses and look elsewhere. If he is interested, he will look back frequently and eventually move towards your direction and offer to get you a drink or something else, but if he doesn't, you can always move in on him and start chatting, you'll soon learn if you've made an error of judgement. 

   Once in verbal communication the next weapon is called 'body language'. Scientific researchers has named it Kinesic, it is way of 'saying' what you feel without using words.

    There are many signs and signals of the body language used on people who are very close, husband and wife for example, the signal used between them may be subtle and individual. But with strangers all of us use a few basic body positions to show how we feel and how we are reacting to others, it is also easy to tell how someone is reacting towards you by studying their physical reactions and facial looks.

   First of all, how you stand will show what message you are sending out. How he stands will prove how he is receiving them . How to show you are interested?, you have to stand relaxed and 'unprotected', which means you don't fold your arms, hide your face with your hand or stand in any kind of guarded position. Be relaxed and loose are the keywords.

   This is a Kinesic's experts description of the confident and interested woman: She stands looking open and receptive, facing her partner, she may have one elbow resting lightly on a fireplace or a chair or holding a drink, the other arm she keeps relaxed, using it occasionally to preen her hair, her body is turned round to face the person she wants to impress.

 When she moves, she moves slowly and carefully, aware of her every step. She is a woman of elegance and beauty, not trying to sell herself away but to attract the one she loves and respects to herself.

   She should still be using 'eye contact' of course and if her body language is working, he should be getting the message, but there is another weapon she can employ if that message doesn't seem to be getting through...the power of smile.

   There are many different kinds of smile, according to researchers, varying from the simple social 'upper smile', which is usually just a greeting, to the 'oblong' which is artificial and means that the person smiling isn't really enjoying herself or himself at all. Any woman bent on attraction should use the lip-in smile or the broad smile. All, by their names are self explanatory, but I will explain further.

   The lip-in is a coy smile with the lower lip drawn in between the teeth, it means that the one smiling is slightly over awed and feels just a little shy. Most men like that.yeah. The broad smile with the lips curled right back, exposing both the upper and lower teeth occurs in situations of pleasurable excitement.

  Both smiles will work as an attraction weapon, says a researcher, and he explains that non verbal signals are most impossible to disguise. He has been studying the way we communicate without words for sometimes and has detailed more than 100 face to face  signals, from the twitch of the eyebrows and the frown to the lowering of the eyelids and the smile. But we are not going to talk about that in this post.

   ''The way we use signals can give extremely valuable information about the way we think,'' he says. ''The mouth is frequently used to express emotions and it is very difficult to disguise these.'' Now with all these signals going full blast to your man's direction, how can you tell if he's receiving them loud and clear? well, to put it brutally. if he can't look you in the eye, he is either not interested or he is terribly shy(do you want a shy man?).

   If he stands with arms folded and body protected, facing away from you even while talking to you, then he is not interested either. If he doesn't smile at all, then you should trade carefully but beware of two strong warning signals, the simple smile and the oblong smile. Remember their meaning and be able to identify by his smiles when he is enjoying your presence and when he is making it up.

   The eyes of course are the big giveaways. If his eyes are smiling at you, then you are in with a chance, if the little pouches under his eyes are swollen, then you are making a good progress, that's a sure sign of enjoyment. also watch out for those pupils, if they are enlarged in a man's eyes his attention is aroused.

   If your signals are received favorably he will soon be sending back a few of his own. When that happens, you can confidently tell yourself that the battle is almost won. And this is how to show a man that you love him. Happy married life in future.